Strange! High School Acquaintance With Boat Still Hasn’t Returned Your Texts

In a startling turn of events, Jenny Preston, Minnetonka resident and owner of a gorgeous pontoon boat, has shown no sign of responding to your barrage of recent texts about her summer plans, despite the fact that you grew up in the same subdivision but actively avoided each other for the majority of your adolescence!

It’s really odd, but looking back through the dozens of messages you’ve sent her over the past month, there’s definitely a logical explanation. Half of these texts probably got lost in cyberspace and didn’t even reach her! Jenny must still be on her family’s Sprint plan, or something. Ugh. It’s so challenging to have a conversation with someone who has no reason to give you attention! 

It’s honestly just weird that she wouldn’t reply to something so clearly intended to be kind and not self-serving at all, like your message at 10:03 AM on July 27th:

“hey J! hope your summer’s great! see you on the lake for byob?” 

Of course, when she didn’t respond within 10 minutes, you sent a follow up:

“lol byob definitely means bring your own boat 😉 hope it’s cool if we use yours?” 

So crazy that you didn’t hear back from her, but thank goodness for social media. You sent Jenny a quick DM on Instagram (water looks gorgeous! can’t wait to join you! which dock should I meet up with you at again???”) after seeing 18 stories in a row prominently featuring a party on her pontoon. 

She didn’t respond to that, either, but it’s probably because her phone fell in the lake and is now ensconced in a bowl of rice. It’s definitely not because you two don’t have any semblance of a friendship and she’s blocked you from viewing her private account! 

It’s such a Jenny thing to read messages without responding. It’s definitely nothing personal! How could it be personal? She barely knows you! Which is why it’s so important that you get to know each other better this summer. On her boat. 

OMG! Jenny just responded to your texts saying “Please stop contacting me. You’re not my friend and you’re not going on my boat,” which is totally her random sense of humor.